Thanks for the reminder

So I feel like I have been spending a lot of time on line since my doctor put me on pelvic rest. While I am so glad that he did that and not full blown bed rest, it is just another reminder of how hard this pregnancy thing really is, and another thing I feel guilty about. 

I can no longer vacuum, be on my feet longer then an hour at a time or lift Drew. I can't go for walks, do my prenatal yoga, do the dishes (though I do.), go to the park and play with my son, I can't make love with my husband (Read: Cranky and bitchy), I have to pre-plan my meals so I don't stand for hours over the hot stove. My shopping trips are in and out, no more last minute trips to la Grande to just walk down town. I love that I can still do things, but I hate that I feel so limited. 

I hate being dependent on others to do the things that are MY job. I am a stay at home mom, my job is simply to cook, clean and care for my son. Not that hard. But now I have to depend on Nayt to do the basics like bringing up the laundry from the basement to I can fold it, clean my floors, or move the simplest thing. When your husband works 60 to 65 hours a week, that time is very limited.  I am trying to let go and not stress about it, but it kills me to have junk on my floors. We look like slobs and while I know it isn't worth me doing it, I still want to. 

I could care less about not seeing my toes, losing what little figure I had, stretch marks or even having a major surgery to get my daughter out. I am even ok with the uncomfortable feeling, the being huge and the  morning sickness.  I just want a normal pregnancy. One where I don't have to worry about my blood sugar since day 1, worry about my insulin, worry about if today will be the day i'll wake up with more then just my hands and feet swollen. If I am going to have to deliver her earlier then I am already. If I'll pass the next stress test. 

Then I get comments like I did last night on the clip I posted of Drew. And while I know I shouldn't let it get to me, you know what, it does. So thank you comment poster for the reminder of all the crap I want to do, but can't. I appreciate it.