Life is changing

My goodness, it has been a crazy couple of weeks in our house. And when life gets crazy, unfortunately I don't have much time or energy to blog, which is unfortunate since I NEED to get my thoughts out in the crazy times! But since my children are playing happily in their rooms, I am going to get some of this out, and hope to sort out my thoughts on this rapidly changing life I am leading.

Drew and Lorrie, my "school kids". {Preschool, Senior}

One of the biggest changes going on in our house is that we are now a family of 5, not 4. {No, there is no baby.} Naythan's 18 year old little sister has moved in with us to finish out her last year of high school. She moved in last week and is settling in well. I can honestly say I don't think either of us were prepared to raise a teenage girl anytime in the near future, but here we are muddling our way though this new world of cell phones, homework and boys. {Wish us luck!}

We are also getting our very own little Drew bug ready for his first day of pre-school. {6 days and counting!} He is so excited and I am looking foreword to it. I am still not loving his preschool teacher, but a adore his new speech pathologist. She was great about listening to my concerns of his oral sensory needs and she firmly believes that his oral needs play into his lack of speech {Yay! Someone took me seriously!!} She also thinks she has some things that will help him along in this area. He will be going to school on Monday and Wedsday from 10-2 in the little school house right next to our place. He has his Cars backpack all ready to go. I really hope that he continues to love school once it starts. I am a little concerned since we have had some rough Sundays lately with Sunday school. {Drew is the only kid I have ever known to get kicked out of Church at age 3}. Since vacation he hasn't wanted to leave Nayt and I, and I am afraid we are going to get the same throwing up, head banging, hand biting issues with preschool.

We also have Drew's neurobehavioral visit next week. I have so many knots in my stomach about that too. I am so torn. One part of me still firmly believes our Pedi that he is on the spectrum, then I watch him interact with others and I wonder at least until a melt down comes for hours at a time. I know that you can have autism and still not display all the signs of it {ie, being social but making limited eye contact. he loves to play with others but doesn't look me in the eye unless i force him too}. I am just scared. So much is resting on this. We are not getting much therapy through the school, and lets face it, we can not afford private OT. We NEED a solid dx to qualify for Idaho's Katie Becket Program which will help us out with all his therapy needs until he is 6.

This summer has been rough. Drew has been displaying behaviors I have no clue what to do about. He is angry and frustrated and I feel like he is a cute little ticking time bomb. I don't want to see his little sister hurt when he finally goes off. He has been biting {me} and himself more often, hitting, and lashing out when things don't go his way. It scares me and makes me sad. I don't want an angry kid, but I don't know what else to do. We have our simple sensory diet {we only saw the OT from Infant Toddler twice} but it doesn't really do the trick. I have taken out 90% of his sugar/food coloring/processed foods. I have punished, rewarded and redirected. I am at a loss. I need more professional help.

Finally there is me. I feel like I am trying to ride out this wirl wind of rapidly changing things, and it isn't easy. Just when I feel like I have things figured out and running smoothy, life changes again. It's exhausting. I am really hoping that things slow down now that school is here, but I have a feeling that from here on out life is just going to get busier. I like my slow paced life. I can keep up with it. Stepping up my pace, keeping up with life, potty training a 3 year old, chasing my 1 year old, and dealing with a dating teenager is going to give me gray hair!

So, if I fall off the face of the planet, come look for me. And please, bring a bottle of wine with you!