This crazy tragic almost magic life

We were so blessed with Drew, we never had to really "try" to have him. We just had simple perfect newly wed sex. I really thought I would be expecting another one by now. Nope. Instead, I am dealing with long, non ovulatory cycles. Each month we go without of positive test, the more I am thankful for Drew. We are going on 7 months of trying, and I know that it isn't long in the big picture, but its so hard to not get frustrated with my broken body. January is the date to start clomid. After that, I will have to come to terms with the fact that we will have an only child. I nearly lost it the other day, as much as I love Drew, I want him to be a big brother SO BAD!

I wish I would have enjoyed being pregnant more, enjoyed holding a new born more, tried to breast feed even harder. From here on out, I will no longer be waiting for the next stage, but will enjoy my son at what ever stage he is. (the whole almost walking, making me laugh learning new things amazingness)  This is my promise to myself. And when the time comes we have another one, I will enjoy every moment of being pregnant too. I think there is something to be said about trying and wanting it so bad, even morning sickness sounds good!!