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| Alynn Rose Luther 7 lbs 5 oz 18.4 inches long |
We are once again having some breastfeeding issues and it is incredibly draining, both emotionally and physically. I know it is one of the lame side effects of PCOS. (Do we see a trend here?) I am doing everything I can to keep what little supply I have up. We are on a nurse, formula, pump every two or three hours but the whole routine takes up to an hour and a half, so I really only have another hour and a half until we are doing it all over again. I have honestly started to wonder at what point do I lose myself and become less of a mom and wife because of all the time spend with my boobs, but I know that ever little bit of breast milk it better then none, it‘s like being stuck between a rock and a hard place. And maybe by some miracle something will happen and we will be able to drop the formula. Maybe?
Anywhoo… on to what I wanted to type out so I don’t forget it, Alynn’s perfect planned c-section birth story!
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| My sweet little love! |
May 16th started incredibly early. I could hardly sleep the night before because of nerves so when 4am rolled around I was ready to be up. By 4:30 Nayt and I were making the rainy trek to the hospital 30 miles away. We showed up a couple minutes early and our pre-op room was waiting for us. I dressed down into the awesome hospital gown and waited patiently for the nurse to get this ball on rolling. By 5:30 she was in prepping my belly and neither regions, nothing says humiliation like a stranger shaving you. She was great about taking our birth plan and even complimented me on how well thought out it was, she was totally on board with waiting for the catheter until after my spinal. We then started the fun game of “Let’s get an IV started.” I am a phlebotomist, I know I have crappy veins on a good day. She tried my left hand first and after 5 painful minutes she blew the vein, (I am still bruised!) Another nurse was called in, who fished around on the other side first in my wrist and she finally got me hooked up in my hand. By this time it was almost 7 am and we were set to go into surgery at 7:30am. The anesthesiologist showed up for a few to explain exactly what would be happening, Nayt got into his sexy scrubs and Dr. Duncan stopped by to check my quickly rising blood pressure.
7:28 am Nayt kissed me good bye and I was helped into a very cold OR and told to sit on the table where I was given my spinal. Everything worked perfectly and I was numb within minutes, my cath was painlessly put in and the whole surgical team was showing up. Finally they let Nayt back in and we were on our way. I remember Nayt holding my hand and telling me how great I was going. All the what ifs were running through my head. What if I didn’t control my sugars enough? What if my blood pressure effected her? What if they missed something? Finally at 7:44am, I heard the greatest sound ever, my sweet little girl’s scream and the doctor saying “Look at all that red hair!” Nayt was called over by the pedi and was allowed to trim the cord, she was weight and measured then brought over to me. All I could do was stare at her until the pedi told me I could kiss her. At that moment, it wasn’t love that was washing over me, it was relief, we did it she was here safe and seemingly healthy!
I don’t know how long I was in surgery after that, all I know is that it was longer then expected. Post op nurse was waiting for me, and the moment I was settled she was bring in Nayt and Alynn. Seriously the most glorious sight, seeing him holding our little girl. I got to nurse her right away and she was starving but perfect! I was told that unless they saw our files, they woudl never have guessed she was from a diabetic mom, her sugars looked great and everything was text book which was music to my ears! We were in recovery for about an hour then they pushed us into the room that would be home for the next 3 days. We has just gotten settled when my mom and Drew showed up, carrying a cute pink giraffe for his sister.
That first day was a blur, by 3 I was up walking and I was trying to bond with Alynn. I kept waiting for that awesome wave of affection and love I felt right away with Drew and it was my first experience that things are slightly different, looking back now, I can’t believe I didn’t feel as in love with her, I am so in love now and I can’t imagine my life with out her. I guess after our journey to get here, relief it was over was the bigger emotion. By the next morning I finally felt that awesome motherly wave of love for her.
The next day they removed my cath and Ivs, though I continued to get pain killers through the hep-lock since the vicodin was doing nothing to cut the burning pain. Drew and mom spent more time with us that afternoon and he continued to pretty much ignore his sister since the sink was much more interesting. I was very disappointed with the nursing staff at the hospital, I had asked to speak with the lactation consultant early on, because I wanted to talk about supply issues, and we didn’t get to see her until Wednesday morning. I also felt like we were pretty much on our own, it would take then close to 30 minutes to bring me pain killers and I would have to ask for more pads or to have my bed changed. It was nothing like Walla Walla. Plus the food sucked. Since my blood pressure looked great they asked if we wanted to go home, it was a big huge yes!
The past week home has flown by, my mom was here to take care of just about everything and my dad and sister flew out on Friday. Drew has been great with his sister and he now refuses to go to bed without giving her a kiss. The only hitch in an otherwise perfect week is that Alynn went from 7lbs 5 oz to a tiny 6 lbs 4 oz and she has yet to get past that weight. I am trying hard to not let it get to me but the daily weight checks are getting old, and tomorrow is our first day in over a week we can just stay home. I am healing alright, though I think I tore the stitches and am still very sore. I am learning that no matter how much help I have, mommies don’t get sick days at all and that 11 days of someone here I should just count myself lucky.
Sorry that was so long. I am falling asleep now that the Tylenol 3 is hitting me so I’ll leave it at that! Now off to cuddle my sweet princess a bit before our 12 am feeding!
Congratulations! She is adorable!
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