Answers, finally.

We finally have answers, and with those answers I feel like I am asking even more questions. I am just simply learning that is a part of life. And with those questions, I am still trying to come to terms with Drew's diagnoses, especially after the horrible shooting this past week.

So, we finally got in to see the neuro after an excruciating 10 1/2 month wait in which I researched my butt off, asked questions and jumped to conclutions. I am still waiting for the offical paperwork to be in so we can get the action plan going, but what we have now is better than what we had a few months ago.

With the adaptive behavior assessment he scored a total score of 62 which is low. He scored a 32 on the CAR-S which puts him in the mild-to-moderate symptoms of autism, and on his observation he scored a 0 in communication, and 4 in socialization which puts him below cut off for ASD. At this point this is all the information I have and if I am being honest, I don't truely understand it all which is fine. I am taking the test results to show a good friend over Christmas and I hope she can help me sort it out.
They told me he is not on the spectrum, though he displays autistic tendencies. He does have severe sensory processing disorder (which we knew), mixed receptive/expressive language disorder and phonological disorder (which we knew) and they are diagnosing him with disruptive behavior disorder- nos. He also has sleep impairment and possibly a global development delay, however he is incredibly smart and they think his IQ is above average.

I knew nothing (and I am still feel clueless) about disruptive behavior disorder which is a subset of Opposition Defience Disorder, however from some reasearch this is what I am learning:


"Disruptive Behavior Disorder is a technical term that refers to a specific portion of the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, 4th Edition, Text Revision, abbreviated as DSM-IV-TR. The section is a subset of the Disorders Usually First Diagnosed in Infancy, Childhood, or Adolescence, with the subcategory name of Attention-Deficit and Disruptive Behavior Disorders.

It is reported that the Disruptive Behavior Disorders occur in between 4% and 9% of children, making them the most frequently found psychiatric disorder of children. It is found 3 to 4 times more often in children with an IQ that is below average than in those children who have a normal IQ. It is not unusual to find it coexisting with other disorders, including ADHD, mood disorders (such as depression), and substance abuse. In fact, estimates suggest that about 2/3 of children with ADHD will have a comorbid Disruptive Behavior Disorder diagnosis." (http://behaviordisorder.org/articles19.html)

Also, some of the symptoms include:

• Consistent defiance of authoritative figures
• Inability to take responsibility for bad behavior
• Temper tantrums on a regular basis
• Vengeful behavior and resentment
• Aggressiveness toward people or animals
• Destroying property
• Stealing and lying
• Bullying
• Constant rule breaking

(Read the Full Page: Disruptive Behavior Disorder NOS – Symptoms and Causes – Treatment
AllAboutCounseling.com )

They firmly believe that his DBD is a direct result of his severe sensory processing disorder and that if we can get that sorted out then we should be ok. Still, as his mother I am not going to lie, I walked away from my very first google search scared.  it is still scary. This honestly scares me more than autism ever would. At least with autism I felt there was more help, more understanding and more compassion. I felt like my child has the possiblity to become something dangerous, would grow up to harm others and it would be all my fault. Great. I felt angry, bitter and just like but once the fear lessened it was like I was slapped with a massive log, My God is bigger than this. HE created my precious Andrew. HE knew that Nayt and I could manage any disorder he might have, and God gave us this journey for a reason. So while yes I am scared, confused and hurting, I am also incouraged to know that I do not walk this journey alone. I do not have to handle it all on my own and I have a God who loves and made my boy special.

I am also refusing to look at my son with the "what ifs" in my mind. He is a loving, beautiful, smart and kind boy. It is these charteristics we are stiving to nurture. We are stiving to show him God's love, that we are to love one another and to put others before ourselves. Giving him the love of Jesus, the joy of the spirit and that grace of God. I also feel that a lot of it has nothing to do with him, but is all about my reactions to him as a mother. He knows what buttons of mine to push, and if I keep my cool he actually behaviors well. Training myself though is hard, and I have a long way to go.

So we are once again waiting for the offcial paperwork, but we are on the waiting list for the Katie Beckett program so that Drew can start private therapy for his sensory needs. I will say that since school has started I have seen a massive change in him. And that makes so happy. He is talking more, he is handling his temper better, and we are rewarding good behavior more often than correcting negative choices.

Answers are hard, but not as hard as accpeting the results. I didn't expect this turn, but we are hanging on, going with it and moving on to the next stage of this journey, not as autism parents, but as a unique special needs family of our own.


(To anyone who may have a child with disruptive behavior disorder or may know of someone who does, I would love to read their blogs/email them. I do feel very alone in this right now!)