Things I want my kids to learn

I have obviously been thinking about a lot of things lately. In fact I can't seem to shut my brain off. I think when I am listening to music (Hello my new fav band, The Civil Wars), I sit there and ponder things when I am doing dishes, I solve life's riddles when I am in the shower, and I think when I am laying there in bed trying to fall asleep. My brain doesn't even shut off then and lately my dreams have included the things I am feeling a bit unsettled about and trying to find answers too.

One of the things that have been on a constant loop in my head is what kind of impact am I making. I am currently in my junior year of my bachelors degree (YAY!) and my goal is to work with the health department, making policy changes and helping to improve the lives of those in my community. I really want to work with homeless and high risk young women, single pregnant mothers and women in abusive situations. This is where my heart is. However, I am learning that by looking at the future it is so very easy to forget about the little lives that need me more than anything else right now in my own home.

The daily grind of being a full time stay at home mom wears me down and I get so anxious for the days when I can get dressed and do my own things that I over look how special these moments of craziness really are, how much my kids truly need me, and how very special and unique they both are.


As a mom it can also be easy to fall into the "Mommy" trap, when you start comparing yourself to other moms in your life or online. I am quick to forget that people often only show a quarter of who they are online, and while everything may LOOK polished, put together and pretty on facebook it can be a very different thing in real life. I pride myself on being honest and open, but I am guilty of this. I don't take pictures of my self, my kids or my house unless we all look clean and put together. You won't see pictures of me or my house when we look the way we do at this very moment.

All of that to say I am really trying to focus on what is important. My messy hair or carpets that need to be vacuumed don't matter in the long run. What matters is the hour I played in a flower/baking soda/water combo with the kids looking for treasure. What matters is the slashing and giggles when they helped me do dishes, or how they made a train out of the boxes when I was trying to clean their room and instead of being mad, I became a ticket collector. THAT is what matters. I must confess that this is hard for me. I love being a mommy, but I get frustrated so easily when they act like the little kids that they are and not the perfectly behaved little people that I sometimes want them to be. I forget that first and for most they are kids.

This all got me thinking about what am I going to teach my kids and what will they learn from ME. I am not talking about their ABCs, how to use the potty, or what kind of music is the best, but the real deep things that they will carry with them into adulthood, the things that become apart of them, and they things that are so engraved into them is becomes their nature.

1.) I hope my kids learn how to love from me.

I am not just talking about the mushy-fall-in-love-and-get-married kind of love, though that it apart of it, but about the genuine love of God that you should have for everyone you meet. The deep and honest love of people that can only be from someone else, the love of your friends and family that makes you do anything for them, the love that looks over faults, forgives, and doesn't hold a grudge. The love that is real. The love of art, music, sports and activities. The love that doesn't judge people. The deep and passionate love that keeps a marriage strong, and most importantly the love of their creator that makes all the other kinds of love possible. I pray they learn this from me.

2.) To respect, not only others but themselves as well.

Having a high school student in my house this year has opened my eyes in many different ways, and it has truly shown me just how important respect is. You can not get anywhere good in life without respect. Again, there is so much incorporated into respect. I want them to respect us as parents, to respect rules, authority, and others. I want them to respect the other sex, I want them to respect themselves and to never compromise themselves in a way to bring them shame.

3.) To Dream big

I truly believe that life is to short to be unhappy and that dreams are a good thing. I want them to believe anything is possible and with a little bit of work those dreams can become reality. I want to encourage those dreams, and to never give up on them. If Alynn wants to be a dancer, then I will encourage it. If Drew wants to be the next president, then I will do anything in my power to help him there. Dreams are an amazing thing.


I have many more thing I want them to know, but I will save those for later.

So, what do YOU want your kids (or future kids) to know? Want to share? Email me your "Things I want my kids to learn" to heatherluann@gmail.com with a link to your blog and I will feature you on here. Want to be anonymous? That works too! I just think it would be interesting to see what other things you hope your kids learn from you!